I hate Mother's Day, and think it's probably something I'm going to talk to T about when it gets closer. In the US, it's May 11th this year.

I'm usually out of town and busy with my own things on Mother's Day - or at least, I have been for the past few years. The same thing happens for Father's Day. It's partly a conscious choice, and partly just coincidence that certain events out of town fall on those days.

I will out of town and unavailable this Mother's Day. I kinda feel guilty about it, because I know it's an important day for my Mom, but at the same time, I really struggle with celebrating a day that honors her when that's not how I feel a lot of the time. I love my Mom, but we don't have a strong relationship, and I have a lot of resentment towards her for so many things that have happened in the past. I struggle to relate to her. She clings on to me like I'll vanish if she lets go, and it drives me absolutely insane. I feel like I'm not allowed to be my own person - I must be an extension of her. Celebrating Mother's Day feels inauthentic and it feels more like an obligation than something I want to do. I'm never really sure how to handle the holiday.