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Old Mar 26, 2014, 05:33 PM
Yearning0723 Yearning0723 is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Jan 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,127
I have issues with this. I have issues saying the words, I have issues showing it in my actions, and I have issues knowing when it's okay and when it isn't. I find that my biggest issue is that when I really like someone and then feel guilty about how attached I am to them, I'm really sarcastic or just act indifferent to them so they won't see how much I care about them. I'm terrified of people feeling like I care too much about them and then distancing themselves from me.

I realized this today with T, how we've been working together for nine months and even today in our last session she still thinks I don't like her or I resent her, when really I am incredibly fond of her (and way, way too attached, all things considered). I told her one time that I felt like I was attached to her, and this turned out very badly, and I think she also didn't realize how deep that feeling was or how hard it was for me to say.

I often give people the impression that I don't like them, when really I do. I notice this with mentor figure and other adults and sometimes even with friends, and I worry that I'm pushing away the people I care about the most by treating them badly (even though I try not to - it seems to be a defense mechanism of some sort). Does anyone else have this issue or have any suggestions about it?
Hugs from:
Anonymous43209, Anonymous59898