I swear I might have had a very brief OBE last night. I felt my body raise up, then was on my back on the ceiling , but just as fast as it happened, I was back in my own body, but left with a massive headache and confusion.

Part of me thinks my body is ready to die, but I think I'm having a hard time letting go because I want to know my family is always safe. I don't know. I do know that I am terribly depressed.

Anyway, it was a strange experience last night. I don't know what to think about it. I've never had an OBE before that I am aware of.

When I first attempted on my life, I had the strangest visions of people around me, of guillotines, of cameras everywhere, things like that and way before Edward Snowden even exposed things. That in itself still bewilders me to no end. Very , very odd. Its in my records....I remember the doctors telling me I was not right, that there are not those things, but low and behold, there are.

I just don't know what to think. I'm confused as all heck.