I think we all have feelings of deep excruciating pain where we want a release so bad it feels the only way to ease our pain is to "give it away" like a hot potato.

When I was growing up there were days where I was just plain irritable, a normal emotion except it was made into a "monster" by my parents. I began to fear my own dark side and yes believed I did indeed house a monster, an evil twin within me.

I'd suggest finding someone to talk these feelings out with. Inside they just fester and seem so much more then they really are. We begin to feed them and almost treat them like a god.

take care