I am thinking... I still have to make a choice here. She is not being honest to me. I think of giving her a last chance to tell me the truth. I don't trust her now, and that i the reason i spy on her. That does not mean i like it. In fact i hate it. But how else would i know. I need to be informed so i can make the right decision. And there still is the fact that i know she still has feelings for me. But i don't know how strong they are. Sometimes she is affectionate to me, and other times she is not. More often she isn't. But i still have to think, we have 8 years behind us, and we both made sacrifices to get where we are(were). Is that reason enough to try and fight so i can have this relationship? 8 year(we live together for 7 years, just like a family, but no legal documents).
Emotions are hard.