If you have suicidal thoughts, go to the ER and have them ask fore a psychiatric consult. Explain your worries and tell them you are definitely thinking of suicide. They will send you upstairs for the intake. I do not think they will send away a possible suicide case, just out of the fear of the liability involved. Then I think they will keep you under observation overnight. A doctor will talk to you before releasing you. At least you will have "your foot in the door" so to speak.

Isn't there a public crises center? That would be another option. Do not call them. Just go there! I hope you will follow through with this.