I'm so sorry for all you went through and losing your precious baby. It's painful to survive when your normal ways have been taken away. It's o.k. to feel sorry for YOU. That's what I say. Feel sorry all you want. No one truly knows how bad you feel to have lost all that you have. Of course you cannot do the things you once did because you are recovering from an enormous shock to your body. I will say this, in time you will be able to do everything you once did before. You may not do it the same way and it may take you longer to do things but you will find a way to manage without the toes and fingers you lost. Your beauty is still intact, your eyes, your smile, your mind. But there's no need to worry about that now. Just focus on healing and getting back to normal. In time you will see how you are progressing with every day that passes. Don't expect to much of yourself to fast. This will take time but it will come.