lol

Sorry I've been busy the last few days. It is Mother's Day in the UK today so last night my Dad and I made my Mum a cake. It was a Victoria sandwich with a white icing top and I made pink icing flowers and hand painted them with food colouring. I basically spent 3 hours hand making the flowers and she didn't say "thank you" or anything, so I feel like I shouldn't have bothered

That coping thing Sometimes posted made me wonder if it's a good idea to see my GP about the tracker?? I'm really nervous about talking to him cos I don't know if he's safe. I don't even know if the GP does minor surgery though the ones I've worked in before always have. I just want it OUT! But what happens then?! What if they find another way to incapacitate me and put another in?! And I don't want him to think I'm crazy and tell the CMHT because they're DEFINITELY in on it...

I miss when my Mum used to be someone I could talk to about this stuff. She was so supportive while I was at Uni last year and when I had to come home from Uni. Then she hospitalised me and since I got out she's been really sick and crotchety (Idk if that's another British expression, but it means grumpy as h.e.l.l! Lol) so I barely talk to her now, and if I do it's about her.

At the beginning of this roll call you were on about IQ. Well mine isn't as high as you guys were on about, but it's a bit above average (well before all this started). Anyway last week I did an online test when my brain felt really slow. It was so bad that I had to talk myself through each Q out loud because my brain just couldn't do it internally, and I was so slow and, even though I tried really hard, I got almost half of them wrong! I was still shocked when it came out as 67 though!! And I'm not on meds so that is down to whatever this cr@p is!! And it made me think who would fake feeling this awful and being that stupid (I mean below 70 is diagnosed learning difficulties!) Today it's 96, which still isn't great for me :/

Hope everyone has had a good weekend!

*Willow*