Thank you for all the replies. As silly as it sounds I dont have anyone to talk to, but I am going to start. I have always felt ashamed and angry to talk about things. It turns to anger, bitterness, and hatred very quickly. I have really started to write about the things that have happened to me and the very far from normal life I have lived. I feel depressed that I have wasted so much of my life feeling sorry for myself. But over the last week I have wrote almost 20,000 words and I am only into my very early teens. When I read it back to myself my own jaw drops. Thank you for all the kind words