That's a complex post and I don't think I'm equipped to respond in a way that would be helpful. I can tell you that I have days that I am emotionally blunt. Other days I feel so much love that I can barely contain it. I'm not sure but I think I may have always been this way. That may help you to feel less alien If I knew the reasons for this it would probably be much more useful. Personally I can readily feel much more love and empathy for animals than for humans. I don't even understand mine so how could I hope to understand and help yours.