Quote:
Originally Posted by hvert
I may be misreading your post, but I consider it a red flag that she is upset that you are 'judging' her. It sounds to me like she has not fully accepted how wrong her behavior has been in the past, which is not a good sign for your future together.
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It would be difficult to guess at why she isn't facing dismay her boyfriend displayed with open arms- my guess is that, really, no one likes to feel shame.
Even if she accepts what she did was wrong [which I think would be the assumption I'd go with if someone is revealing something to me like that], wants to make amends, wants to change, is changing... she could still feel shame about it.
Even if you think you are prepared for ANY kind of reaction someone might have, it's still going to hurt.
I don't think the OP did wrong by reacting naturally or questioning at all, but it's going to be a painful thing to process this and gain some trust given the new context.
That's pretty much just how life works- we face consequences for our actions, sometimes they suck, bad things make us feel bad. Not much getting around a lot of that.
:/