Hi oneconfusedgirl, really glad you've shared some of what's going on for you!!
As for religion I'd say that sophiesmom is spot on in "letting it out gradually". Your parents may initially see it as your rejecting/dismissing/disrespecting them, what they've given you, the way they've brought you up, what they've taught you if they are strictly religious. So maybe best to just raise some uncertainties/questions/concerns first, just phrase them in questions to begin with. That way you'll begin to see how they react and if at a later date you come out and tell them that you don't believe it might not be so much of a shock and they'll at least feel that you've tried to make sense (your own sense) of things.
I know that must seem so unfair, because you absolutely have the right not to believe and that shouldn't effect how much your parents (or anyone else!!) should care for you/love you. But if they are under the belief that worshiping...........is "good for your soul", "keeps you safe" etc then they may find it difficult if their daughter (who they love?) is choosing another way.
I'm reading that there is a lot more to it than religion though??? Do you think that maybe you could start by telling them some of what you're finding difficult, the way it makes you feel (really important), and how you might like things to be different. There's a chance that there may need to be some compromises between you but at least it's going to be a step in a better direction. And if they can just start to understand just a little that's got to help.
And for some "rules" they have they may even be able to explain the "why"'s a bit better so as they are more meaningful to you e.g. they've learned x from particular life experiences they've had. Then maybe they'll make more sense or maybe you can reason another side with them?
But either way it's going to be real hard for them to use the opportunity of being there for you, supporting you, valuing you as you, helping when you need it, if they don't know...............
It is OK and you can still have a really good relationship with them if you don't tell them everything in your life- whatever age, we don't necessarily tell our parents everything but maybe move it one step further so they can see and be there for you a bit more.
As for other people.....well what are true friends for other than to like us for us??..........and there are going to be people like that, maybe around you, maybe close by, maybe if you look a little further. But you've always got to take the chance in being open to find out that you really do have friends that matter/true friends. It is really important to be able to be who you are.
And we're here for you too, by the way!!!
Alison