Hear ya. Yesterday was…. well, without going into the whole thing…. stressful. And way too much serious medical scenery. (BF's ordeals, not mine. Mine were of the mental variety (but not involving being a patient) for the latter part of the day till getting home from the ER at 2 am.) Followed by 3 1/2 hours of sleep till an exasperating mind**** before 6:30, and off to work!

Had some trouble focusing. Yeah. Would it be bursting into tears? Numbness? Existential exasperation? Just walking out of work for no particular reason and just wander directionless till I drop because I don't know where to go or what to do? Out of my depth. No question mark with that. The hospital floats across my mind. But why? I'm doing pretty well. Aren't I? Considering? I don't know. I just have no idea what I'm supposed to do. The thought of talking makes me paranoid. Feeling like a goldfish again. (In a pond of piranhas. For those unfamiliar with my mental landscape. The dominoes. Is the blender on or off? I.don't.know. Just keep it away from the water, right? Isn't that what it says in the manual? I don't know, because I was too busy trying to figure out wtf happened for them to have to tell everyone: Do not operate while sleeping.

Going to sleep early, that's for sure. Once I can snap out of this trance. The thought exhausts me.