The trouble is I have never found a good shrink like a poster thinks everyone does , they have all been not the slightest help in my illness and that is the truth . They got me hooked on Ativan 35 years ago , and tried to kill me in detox to cover there mistake. They let me now pick my own meds that way its not there fault . I try every way I can to keep control of myself ,not them they haven't a clue , I do it for my family. I self helped on booze because the hospital has no answers , now I cannot do that because of the damage it caused. Life is how you live it I don't live hiding away I have just come back from a meal out with my wife kids and grandkids , I didn't feel great but I don't let them know why spoil there night.