Hello there! Welcome to PC I hope you can find a home here with us! We're always here to listen whether you're looking to rant or get advice! It's sounds like you've had quite the tough battle with depression but I'm also very glad you're reaching out to a bunch of different resources (including us!). Medication, while helpful, is not what I consider the solution either. But on a good note, since it is something that is in ourselves, the answer is also within us as well

If you don't mind me asking, what book did you get?

Again, welcome to PC! I hope things start looking up for you soon!