Part of the "no big deal" feel for some of us is that, at least in my case, the friendship really did develop as no big deal. It wasn't something we sat down and had a big talk about. It wasn't something I asked for and he granted to me. It just naturally happened without any particular planning or thought really put into it -- kind of like most natural friendships develop. It kinds of seems to me that if you have to plan and ask permission and fret about it, perhaps it is just not meant to happen.