I'm a very light sleeper. If I fall asleep for a while, I usually end up waking up and getting online. I'm always searching for something online, and I don't mean something superficial. I'm looking for something to fix me or fix my life. Seeking a connection with something or someone that finally brings me peace of mind and a scrap or two of joy or understanding. It never quite happens though. I will sit here for hours in distress, at times almost collapsing on the keyboard in exhaustion. I will finally go to bed, and maybe sleep a few hours, and then get up and start searching again.

Rather than be productive and accomplish something, I just keep searching. Rather than channel my angst into my writing projects, I just keep seeking whatever it is that my psyche endless yearns for.