Quote:
Originally Posted by HazelGirl
I don't know if it's because I can't stand the idea of her caring, although that's a possibility. I think it's more because I feel like I should be able to do things myself. I should be able to handle life and manage my own problems. And yet, I can't, and so it's sort of a rebellion against my limits and weaknesses to do it anyway. I also just hate taking things from people because I feel like I will owe them something in return and I hate being indebted to anyone, and I don't feel worthy or valuable enough to accept such a gift from someone.
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Thank you for the clarification. Yes, I know the problem, so I think I cannot give you any good advice - sorry... I also think that I should do everything by myself, never ask for help and never "take" anything from others... E.g. when the session time is up, I immediately stand up and it doesn't matter that I am (or T is) in the middle of a sentence, I do not feel allowed to stealing any minute of my T's time
But on the other hand, you know how much you'll suffer if you do not accept T's help... Is it really better to stay with your limits or maybe you could meet somewhere between? Like can you find a compromise which would allow you to stay in contact with your T but which would not cause a protest in your every cell? Something which you could accept even if it is not so easy? I don't know, shorter sessions, phone/mail support, session every 2 weeks or something else?