Quote:
Originally Posted by nottrustin
This may sound horrible. It is not intended to be but I really care about you. Do you think you tried to kill yourself in front of him or do you think it was your way of getting his attention?? You got him to hold you close and chase after you...
Hugs...I am sorry you are going through such a difficult time.
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I don't think I wanted to get attention because I have tried to kill myself before because of him. But that day I did it after session, I felt like there is no where to go, I felt so horribly desperete and all I wanted was to see him again for just a second, I just couldn't walk away.
I have problems with self-control, I'm scared of myself that's why I overdosed Xanax- to be not able to do something stupid again.
Interesting that when I ask something in my posts people are starting to talk about other things about me and never replie to my questions. Okay not everyone.
But I'm not angry at all, I just don't know what to do to control myself, it's so hard. I didn't think when I did all those things, I even can't remember how it happened, I even was shocked I almost fell down and asked myself where was my mind gone.
Sometimes I feel like I don't belong here. I don't belong anywhere. The only person who always is there for me is my mother and my therapist though I was so bad to him.