HG I know how u feel. I learned growing up everything came at a price. I learned never to accept gifts because I didn't want to learn what it cost me. My father held everything over my head. He gifted me a computer and flight tickets to go to college. He to this day would hold it over my head saying I owe him for those gifts.

I do not speak to him and haven't for yrs. my partners mother gives me gifts for bday and Xmas, but she never expects anything in return. It is uncomfortable for me to accept these but they do not let me refuse nor do they expect anything from me. It took 28 yrs for me to learn there are some good ppl in this world.

Thank you for the clarification. Yes, I know the problem, so I think I cannot give you any good advice - sorry... I also think that I should do everything by myself, never ask for help and never "take" anything from others... E.g. when the session time is up, I immediately stand up and it doesn't matter that I am (or T is) in the middle of a sentence, I do not feel allowed to stealing any minute of my T's time
But on the other hand, you know how much you'll suffer if you do not accept T's help... Is it really better to stay with your limits or maybe you could meet somewhere between? Like can you find a compromise which would allow you to stay in contact with your T but which would not cause a protest in your every cell? Something which you could accept even if it is not so easy? I don't know, shorter sessions, phone/mail support, session every 2 weeks or something else?