well first of all realize that I am not in the best shape to give advice ,being quite depressed...

but you can think about some things I will say...

quit saying 10 years... you might have been trying to love him for 10 years but you have only made it legal for the last 4

did you ever have a marriage? really a marriage that was give and give to each other?

there is more than two modes: married and divorced

you can separate... get your lives together separately see if you can live alone and without each other see if either of you will change see if it's worth working on

do you realize how much you contradicted yourself in your own post?

how sweet and nice he is being an ***** How is this possible?

<font color=blue> meditation is a true way to connect to the Source </font color=blue>