This IS exactly what it feels like for me also. I have found that the closeness to home and creating my life each day is better as I come to accept and release the expectations of "supposed" to be. Paul, you have started working out, taking care of your body sounds like a beginning!
This is a frustrating start and stop process it seems for me personally.
It is hard to find "just the right" this or that to live with any illness it seems. I'm not fond of roller coaster rides but some days it is just like that....miserably up and down and all over. Meds do help me personally, and exercise and diet. Good places to start.
The anxiety....stress, pain, frustration, check in with the Anxiety forum, they have some ideas.
Are you taking meds? I take Celexa 20mg and Xanax as needed for anxiety/panic attacks. Meds do help, and the times I been off of them are harder than when I am on them,....
Good luck and good health
your friend,
Jade