YOU ARE NOT ALONE! This bloody illness is a wild and destructive roller-coaster ride through life - BUT IT DOES GET BETTER when your mental health professionals find the proper mix of psychotropic meds that will keep you stabilized. I've been symptom free of BP1 now for sixteen months. That's a miracle, because I'm a "rapid-cycler" (i.e. 4-5 episodes each year). I was first diagnosed in a state of manic-psychosis with homicidal features, and five months later, the FBI caught up with me. You can't say that I haven't had my fun with this disorder.