Quote:
Originally Posted by Favorite Jeans
If she didn't say it with harshness in her voice she may have meant something else.
She may have meant that you see asking her for time/care/empathy as a huge favor and feel uneasy, like you're worried about her putting herself out. She's replying that all that comes with the territory, it's what she signed up for when she became a T. It's not that she sees you as a job in a cold, impersonal sense but that she feels that it's all par for the course that you have needs and want to be cared about and she's happy to be there for you.
It's not a favor to you, it's just what she does. You can feel free to ask. You don't have to be grateful that she's there for you, she's saying you deserve nothing less.
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I honestly can't say for sure. It sounded really harsh to me. But then again, maybe I wanted it to be harsh? Maybe it was harsh because she thought I was trying to change the subject? Because I was trying to change the focus to her? Because my depression was more serious than whether she cares about me?
That is why T's shouldn't leave their clients "hanging" all week wondering wth is going on. An explanation could save me a lot of grief.
I hope everyone on here is right. I hope it's a communication error. I know she never shows emotion in her emails and to not take that personally. And I know I have misunderstood her a few times (we have actually gotten into debates over what exact words were said...she wins all the time if it's verbal...I only win when I have written proof).
I am so grateful to her. I care about her so much that I wanted to spare her the pain/disappointment of me giving up. I was trying to "release" her from all her obligations. So that she wouldn't feel responsible for me. I don't want to lie to her, break a promise to her, or hurt her in anyway shape or form...why I'm still freaking here. I am one of those people who live through others...and right now, I'm living because of her. It's not healthy, it's not smart. But it is what it is...and the goal is to change that slowly. I truly need her right now to survive. And everyone knows that...