Hi, I can empathize with you. I went through a similar event earlier this year. My depression, anxiety and BPD were out of control even though I did not change my meds. In Aspen, where I lived, it was easy to become very isolated. Aside from the grocery store, most everything had to be ordered via mail or you had to drive two hours each way. I was an out of control hermit. I'm fortunate that I am aware when I need help and start asking for help. My PDoc and T were no longer available so I was down the proverbial creek. I'm fortunate that my ex mother in law (outlaw mom) figured out I was in dire need and drove out to Aspen to rescue me. She brought me to her home and is helping me find the help I need. This happened three weeks ago. I still don't like going out, but I'm having to go out to interview mental health facilities. I've set a goal for myself to accomplish one thing each day. If I do more than one, great. If I don't make it, I try not to beat myself up. My outlaw mom keeps me going in her loving, non judgmental, and non intrusive way.

I hope it starts getting better for you soon.