I think my T falls into the school of thought where there is a limit to how much complaining about a certain issue without actually DOING anything about it that he will tolerate. He will let me complain about certain things seemingly endlessly (trauma related things and my weird responses), and he says that the recovery takes as long as it takes. However, when it came to issues around my husband, he had more of a "DO SOMETHING" kind of attitude, and explicitly stated that he was tired of hearing about H. However, when I explained why I couldn't just DO what I thought needed to be done, he was incredibly helpful in assisting me with coming up with ideas about what I could do to take incremental steps toward where we needed to go.

Just as a human, I know I get tired and impatient of the people who just shoot down each and every suggestion that might help them, and seem determined to just wallow in misery rather than do anything to change their situation. I have a great deal of sympathy for therapist who have to deal with people like that on a daily basis. I think there is a huge difference between people who have suffered trauma and just have to move very slowly in addressing it, and those who are like my mother and just prefer to endlessly complain and have others cater to them and pity them rather than expend the effort to actually improve their lives.

I also understand that I am not inside any other person's head and I do not get to judge whether or not they are actually making an effort. Therefore, I just have to act to preserve my own mental health by avoiding those who just cause me anger and distress by their behavior.