Hi MH, thanks for getting back!!
Now this is just a thought......but have you thought about the types of people you're trying to connect with/build friendships with/share with? You do sound like the type of person who can "give it their all" if there's a "maybe".
Now there are plenty of people out there who may find it hard to "come out of themselves" in general, who may be a little hesitant socially, who may feel a little "out of place", who may have had/have difficulties, who really need (more?) people in their life/a friend, someone who's going to go that "extra mile"/break down barriers like I'm thinking you've got the ability to do. If you're able to go out there and just share then that can make a big difference to someone and you're going to be interested in them as well, right?
Which might take away some of that desperation/clingyness because you're going to know, if it's all good, that you are both giving each other something real.
And then maybe increasing your "circle" of friends can continue from there?
Anyway...just a thought.....
About the guy on the internet though, I'm sure it's so obvious to people (and you too now!!) that the internet can be a "dangerous" place. But you were 14!! You had a "gap" that nothing/no-one else was filling right then, you found yourself in the middle of it all (didn't plan it but.......), thought you found someone who was/could give you.............., you were vulnerable. So don't take any responsibility for anything that went on, if you are or other people are making you think that!!.
But you are "older and wiser" now so you know that you weren't at fault in any way, but you aren't going to find yourself "there again", right?? If you want to talk about it more though.............
The transgendered person.......I know it must have been a real "let down", but you are going to find less sensitive, understanding, caring or approachable people in all walks of life e.g gay, straight, bi, male, female, old, young.........The positive though is that you are going to, just as equally, find people who are going to be...... sensitive, understanding, caring or approachable in those exact same circles. So maybe if not this time, then it will happen another time.
It is good you've got a therapist though, if not so good that you have to wait weeks to see them. But maybe use some of the time in between to write down some of your feelings/things going on for you, so you can give them a clearer picture when you see/speak to them next???
Alison