Thank you very much, everyone above. I don't have a T. Don't want one. I got some "emergency" counseling about a year ago, and the T just said "maybe you should do less." Hearing that wasn't helpful. I know what my options are . . . and I know what his are. He's getting closer to needing me to either move in with him 24/7, or help him find a nursing home. I won't take on more than I can handle. He wouldn't expect me to. There is no amount of therapy that makes these situations easy to navigate through. Sometimes you have to choose amongst sad options. If he goes into a facility, then I will be visiting him there. Right now, I would rather be with him in a home environment.

I gave up talking to my doctors long ago about my stresses because the only response doctors seem to have is, "Well, let's consider adjusting your medications." Then there came to be that sort of competition between my PCP and my pdoc about what I should be on, with my pdoc telling me he thought my PCP was being too severe in restricting how many meds I could be on. They are part of the same system, but couldn't talk to each other directly. Now I hate going to see either one of them. I just force myself to go to get my prescriptions.

I didn't even eat anything decent today, there's nothing much in my kitchen, and it's kind of late to go to the store. My neighbor was pretty inebriated, which I didn't realize when I let him in the door, and he sat down and talked so long before he would leave. Now I'll know not to even answer the door. Maybe tomorrow I can make a fresh start, and take care of what I should be getting done. I come to the computer, or I put on the TV, and I get mesmerized looking at one screen, or the other . . . and just while away time doing nothing that I'm supposed to be doing. I seem to just want some distraction to keep me from thinking. I'm wrong to neglect things and have to make myself do what I should. That's probably the only way to feel better.