I am not really sure myself. I have been with him for over 18 years and that is a long haul for me. 5 of them with him in prison and this mess. I just do not like to hurt people and do not want to see him send himself back to prison because he says he has nothing left if i leave.
I guess i dont like to see people get hurt by my actions, especially someone i cared for. I am taking some time away from him, which is his suggestion to my surprise, and going to try and figure out what is right for me. I just keep flipping back and forth between things.