Depression has taken so many different cool opportunities from me as well :/ It sucks because you want it so much but you aren't ready at the time. If you can, try to use it as ammunition to get angry at your depression and hit the breaks as hard as possible to try and get it to stop running your life (which is ridiculously hard to do lol). But yes, I have shed many tears over the fact that I wanted to be ready for something and couldn't do it.