I think we've all had thoughts, but as wildflowerchild25 said, if you are planning it, that's bad. Get some help. I know I often think things would be easier on everyone if just didn't wake up one morning, but that's a long way from actually acting on those thoughts.

Many of us have been there. I'm a rapid cycler myself. I often have a hard time even understanding what I'm feeling before I move on another mood.

Hang in there, and get some help. No matter what you think at the time, your family is not better off without you.