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Old Apr 09, 2014, 09:29 AM
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trying2survive trying2survive is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Mar 2014
Location: northeast ohio
Posts: 1,085
Quote:
Originally Posted by Withered-Rose79 View Post
How can you love and adore someone SO VERY MUCH for so long, only to wake up one day and realize you no longer have feelings for them? I'm not talking about the usual rollercoaster ride of love/hate emotions that come and go on a daily basis. I've spent 4 years with this man, craving his touch, his love and his attention. We've lived together 2 of those 4 years and he has been my oxygen. I've begged him to acknowledge and seek help for his own mental health issues so that hopefully our relationship will last forever. Some of his problems include lying, stealing, manipulation, feeling entitled, being very reclusive, and so on. I think he has seen me pulling away from him and has decided that if he wants to keep me he needs to work on himself. At the same time, I've begun to evaluate our relationship and part of me feels that I have loved him so deeply for all the wrong reasons. I don't love him for the person that he is, I love him because he hasn't abandoned me. He has been a presence in my life when I had no one else. Having him there has brought me security. When I stand back and look at him without being blinded by the fear of being alone, I don't like the person that he is. I don't like our life together; we have nothing whatsoever in common beyond our mental health issues. And it's bad enough that my children have to suffer my ups and downs, they shouldn't be made to suffer his as well. So while he's waking up and deciding he wants this relationship to last forever, I'm waking up and deciding that maybe I don't. I don't know...
i think you are starting to see this man for what he really is and deciding that maybe this isn't for you, noticing you have nothing in common, the lies and theft & the fact that you don't like the life you guys have together. being alone and starting over can be very difficult, especially for us. i hate being alone and it's only been four months for me, i'm not sure if it was the right thing to break up with my ex( at the time i thought it was) but in the end you have to do what is best for you and your children. i guess my question is do you think he can change? is it worth it for you to wait around to see if he is going to follow through? you got a tough situation on your hands that's for sure. i don't know if i would give up hope yet, but in the end you have to take care of you
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I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper!
Thanks for this!
Withered-Rose79