Welcome (again ) While you certainly are having problems regarding food and eating, I would first have a complete physical and speak to a physician. Do you have food allergies? You either crave or abhor the foods that are allergic to you. Maybe an ENT/allergist could help there. It's common (esp for women) to "drown their sorrows " in food... esp when feeling unworthy...but there are so many reasons for disordered eating.. I hope you do find a therapist to help you unwravel this. TC