I just went for a walk and thought about things, and now I'm angry again. So angry! I hate my life. I hate that I'm so weak and inertial, and that I can't get anything done. I hate that I've never been in a relationship, that no one's ever picked me. I hate all the failure I've dealt with in my life.

I want success. And not just moderate success in one or two areas of my life. I want massive, shocking success, to the point where everyone looks at me and wonders how I do it, in every area of my life. I want to be so successful that everyone who ever denied me their friendship or love regrets their choice and shakes with fear and regret. I want to be so successful that I never have to wonder if I have worthiness ever again; obviously I'll have value, because look at all I've done!

Ugggh.