I understand your desire to lose weight, and yet I feel that your mental stability is much more important. Please consider being more honest with your medical team, and sharing some of the critical concerns that you've laid out here. It's possible that there are drugs out there that will help stabilize you without causing weight gain, i.e. you'll be able to keep off (at least most) of the weight that you've lost.

Furthermore, you really need a balanced diet (to whatever extent is possible on your budget) in order to stay healthy. That's so critical to this illness, as I constantly find out. Often I lose my appetite, and yet I force myself to eat small and frequent meals (I nibble) because I know that my body needs nutrition. It's really, really worrying to me that all you've eaten since Sunday night is a tortilla.

Good luck, and keep us posted.