Quote:
Originally Posted by bixkf
Katie,
Very well said. I like your phrase "When you don't get what you translate into love, you feel unloved. "
I believe that we all need some kind of input like touch, words, sex, etc. as fuel for our own self love and ultimately the love we give back to our partners. Some people are more needy, some people only need a single "I love you" in a day. But take away this fuel or contaminate it, and our "love engines" stall or die.
I too am a touch/small words person. I don't need long hugs, french kisses, gifts, sex, etc. to feel loved. But I do need those basic inputs each day. Is it hard to say "I love you too"? Or get a small peck on the cheek without turning away? For my wife, after 17+ years she doesn't provide this fuel. She doesn't respond even in these basic ways, and when I pursue her for them, she gets annoyed. Why should anyone get annoyed at receiving or expressing love?
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I say that because it's true for me. I really do feel unloved when I don't get those things.
I read your post. Wow.
Well.. maybe talk to her. Maybe separate and get what you need?
Hopefully she'll want to stay friends, because well, that's what you guys seem like now.
And she seems like she stopped trying. And that's a sad state.
My ex did that, got annoyed. And my ex didn't care, I know she didn't. Hence, ex.
I loved her and all, regardless. But I needed to move on and find someone who did fulfill my BASIC need of being loved!!
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