Quote:
Originally Posted by brainhi
My blood family never learned to take care of each other very well. I have stepfamily that I've had to lean on a lately....not for money...just shelter. I hate to lean on anyone for anything financially & have rarely had to do that.
My father did not treat me well in front of my stepfamily...redhead stepchild except I am not a redhead - or he took care of them and not his own chilren (If you have ever seen the movie "The Savages" -w/Philip Seymour Hoffman & Laura Linny- I could have written it). I am in an occupation where we just went through a very slow time - I work with children that struggle with learning..this is the most important thing I have ever done. My life and how I feel about myself changed drastically over the years...but some of the step family still see or treat me as the little loser. Did not have a good discussion tonight w/my stepsister and all those old bad feelings just rose to the surface. Really no where else I can go at the moment - it will change but having a bad sad angry f*** it moment.
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Maybe this will take some pressure off me. Yesterday, I spoke with the scientist who assembled the program we use to help students. It's understood at my office that we are having hardships financially right now. We all love what we do and are trying to get through a slow time. I explained to him that I've had to lean on my family as of late to hold on to this job and it is embarrassing to me. I have always taken care of myself - since I was a teen (family did not take good care of us). My family's answer is to go and find a better paying job. Let me put it this way, I've said it before, my job is my passion - what I get out of bed for and the best thing I have been able to do thus far in my life. I am not going down without a fight. If someone was in a marriage and they loved their life, their spouse and children and were struggling financially - the answer is not to find a richer spouse. I need understanding while I get through a tough time. Yet, I understand it's not my stepsister's role to help me with shelter. Anyway, the scientist is going to call her and let her know that the fact she is helping me is recognized and appreciated while we try to get through this. Not sure what her reation will be but it's all I know to do right now to take some pressure off while I try to carry on.