I'm also depressed and get hypo manic. The days gel together and I never know how I'm going to feel. I feel so different from all those around me. I often assume that happy people are always like that. Like they have no idea how lucky they are to have lots of seritonin in their brains. I find myself getting jealous of how they are. I have no realistic idea if they are truly happy most off the time but I still get jealous. Dumb I know. Am I alone in this feeling? I completely understand what you are going thru cause I suffer from the same disorder. People at work know about my illness and they are always asking if I'm doing good that day. What do I tell them? Of course I say I'm great cause I don't want them to think i can't handle my job being depressed. My job requires me to be happy and present as i work directly with the public. Funny that I do that cause I have major social phobia. It's an easy job and it's very flexible. I need that in dealing with my mi. We are just like anyone else but we suffer from a debilitating illness. It is awful I get that for sure. I'm so sorry yr struggling. You aren't strange to us. We're here for you. Always. Take it easy on yr self.

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