Petunia, I never thought of the tape being something hard to listen to. I am glad that she understood though.

I have built my defense wall sturdy.

It would please T to be able to give me a hug. She asked if it was alright once and I tried, I really did because I would like nothing more than to feel something, but I was a piece of steel.

P-doc told me recently, "you need to try and let me and T nurture you" I could have bolted out the door.

Scares me to death. I don't know what to make out of it. I don't trust it.

I've been seeing my T for ten years and this P-doc for four. You'd think by now...