hey. it isn't too bad. ((((((((((long half life of valium)))))))))
in at work now and determined to have a productive day
(now that really WILL help me feel better)

i was upset for a bit but ((((((((long half life of valium)))))))))
then i was thinking 'its okay that he is sick' (like 'its okay that we can't have a session 'cause his car broke down' and 'its okay that my dad left' etc etc). but then i thought... 'hey... i'm not feeling so %#@&#! hot either. maybe we are in tune with our not feeling so good'. lol. that helped a little. it sucks to be sick. i hope he is okay (((((((((((my t))))))))))). hope he feels better soon (and not just for me). sigh. %#@&#! happens. i'm feeling alright. ((((((((((long half life of valium))))))))

:-)

i called the surgeon. they can't get me in until june. but they really were very sensitive about finding out about insurance and the like. i'll get most of it back and the cost of the consult is manageable for me to pay upfront. they said they would check about insurance (so they can pay upfront) BEFORE doing any surgery etc. so that is okay. hopefully it won't get much bigger if i keep up with the antibiotics. fingers crossed, touch wood etc etc etc. have a friend who is a GP too and he said he can pull a string or two to get me on the books at the clinic he works with (they aren't taking on any new clients right now). he said there is a lady GP there who i should click with. sick of the student health services clinic here (seems to be a refuge for international doctors who don't speak english and i'm tired of getting contradictory and conflicting advice from the different doctors there when it really is unclear that they have understood what i've said). so i will see about draining it (sorry to gross people out) and hopefully get it removed properly in june. so... feeling a bit better today. no. scrap that. feeling a LOT better today :-)

damn emotional instability (sometimes i wished my lows lasted more than couple hours - couple days just as a matter of PRINCIPLE. sigh. damn principles)

;-)