Sorry you felt driven to that level of despair. A tendency toward depression is something that may remain with you, but with support you can learn to better manage it. You sound hopeful. It's good for those who love you to know about your pain. If you do your part to recover, they will be more able to help you. I'm sure they want to see you well again.

You have to look at what led you to where you got, and see what changes you may need to make. Sooner or later, everyone is a bit abnormal in one way or another.

I enjoyed your blog. Congratulations on your accomplishments in dance. Obviously, you can get to a goal when you set your mind to it. Let us know how you are doing.