It is very important to have a good support system within the family. And it's actually my husband and mother-in-law that I turn to when I need someone. My mom pretty much acts like it doesn't exist and had no idea what I meant when I said I was getting manic.
When I get depressed, I always think of my boys and cry over how much I would miss them or what would happen to them. I just can never imagine putting them through any of that, or have it explained to them when they get old enough to understand. My oldest is learning what bp is, and I know it would devastate him and I would worry thinking about how he would cope. Usually thinking of them will eventually get me out of my sui thoughts but I'll still stay in my depression, which consists of laying in bed staring at whatever is right in front of me, crying, or sleeping. Luckily it doesn't last long because I am rapid cycling, but I know even that has an effect on them.
I'm new to this site, but it seems like you can get plenty of support from everyone on here. Do you think having your wife read up on bp or join another forum to spousal support would help her to better understand? That helped my husband when he had absolutely no idea what to do to help me or what signs of triggers he needed to look for. Things were rough when I was first diagnosed.