I know what you mean about looking to pick fights. Any excuse will usually do. A plate could be set in the sink wrong and it will be enough to set me off. It's not even that the plate bothered me, it's just an excuse to start the fight I'm looking for. There seems to something so thrilling about fighting when I'm manic. My wife knows this, so she will just ignore me when I start yelling. Really takes all the fun out of it, which is what usually stops me sooner than I would if she fought back.