Hi guys! So I've been going to therapy for awhile because my GP thought I might have some anxiety related problems from all the panic attacks I've been having away at school but since seeing a therapist she believes the anxiety and some depression might be part of a bigger more underlying problem so I have to see a psychiatrist to deal with why she thinks might be BPD. I've always had a sort of emptiness I've felt with life but I thought that stemmed from depression. I'm very impulsive, sometimes in a bad way, with drinking, piercings, shopping, even promiscuous activities. I also occasionally self harm sometimes for stress and sometimes I'm not really sure why, maybe a distraction. These are mostly controllable but I have had some problems with pathological lying in the past and relationships where I tend to pull people in just to push them away once they start to get close to me. I was wondering what some of you felt your earliest symptoms have been and if you've been able to deal with them. I'm looking forward to working on a solution for my problems but I will admit I'm scared of having BPD not because there's anything wrong with it but because its a bigger problem than I had anticipated which would explain a lot of my behaviors. How do you guys deal with this and the unsureness you feel in life and relationships? What were some of y'alls symptoms or behaviors? Any help would be much appreciated thank you God Bless!!