I totally feel you on the trust issues. I have HUGE trust issues and to top it all off, I'm extremely paranoid when off my meds. And this was the number one reason I fought my girlfriend and my pdoc for a year and a half on therapy. After the first two therapist that in my mind I couldn't trust because they were all in on it (I can't remember what the it actually was now) I finally found my current therapist. It took me about 7-8 sessions before I finally began to trust her and share bits of information here and there. She was so patient with me and that's something I love about her. She'll question and pry but when she see's I'm not handling it or tell her that I don't want to talk about it she'll drop it but she does note it so we can go back to it at a later date.

Another reason I didn't want to go to therapy (and on some days still don't) is because I was worried about what I'd find if I opened up and began digging. I'll be honest, it's not easy sometimes and sometimes I just don't want to go back but I do because it's helping more than it's not. And other times I hate myself for what we talk about but she helps me with that too!

Though, everyone in my life says I'm doing better since I started it so that's got to be something.