I'm having a lot of bipolar symptoms, but what got me thinking is the fact that I can't seem to be able to focus on just one word when reading because my eyes sort of move, like they're gently trembling/rotating, in addition to not being able to focus on slow moving people. Another issue is that my arms are shaking almost daily. For a few seconds I have a "semi-seizure" during which one -or, rarely, both- of my hands' biceps hardens and the rest of the arm shakes. Sometimes the whole arm does that.

I know bipolar and schizophrenic prodrome look an awful lot. I'm sort of afraid to ask my therapist because he then might tell me I'm either a dumb kid who thinks a psychiatric diagnosis is cool, or someone who wants to get those disability money to buy drugs or something like that. I know it's silly, but knowing this doesn't convince me to ask.

Two Saturdays ago I encountered an old man who told me he used to be a painter, he painted even churches, but he had the same destiny as Picasso so now he's a hobo. He then asked me if I had some money to give him to buy something to eat. I told him I had nothing, because many hobos here don't buy food with the money they get, but cigarettes and alcohol. He looked disapointed but he didn't make a scene there. I apologised and left. Then I turned around to make sure he wasn't following me but he was gone, even though when we split up he looked like he was going in the same direction as me. In addition to that, during our small conversation I could see a man with his kids looking at me talking to that hobo, but when turned my head and look at the man, he'd turn his head in the oposite direction. That made me wonder if the hobo was real. Also, the man's hair had the same length my hair had before I cut it at the end of February. He was wearing glasses, just like me, and was almost as tall as I am. I'd also love to paint and draw. That's weird.