I'm sorry that you are struggling If you feel that you need help, then you should ask for it. You don't even necessarily have to tell your family if you don't want to, though I recommend 'testing the waters' with them as Rapunzel suggested.

Basically though I want to caution you. In my experience, putting on a mask with MH professionals gets you labelled as an attention seeker. If you tell someone you are depressed, but you act like you are fine, people generally take your body language over your speech if the 2 are incongruent. MH professionals can't seem to get their heads around people who can pretend to be fine around strangers/work colleagues/loved ones, but then seem depressed or whatever with them. In my experience, unless you respond to auditory hallucinations out loud, or seem distracted by them, they will not believe that you hear voices. You mention that you are a compulsive liar - they could use that against you if you tell them that.

I'm not saying that it's not worth seeking help, because some people are better than others. Nor am I telling you that you have to act 'crazy' to be taken seriously, because you should be authentic to get the help that's needed. I guess what I'm saying is to be cautious about what you say and how you behave, because they will be looking for discrepancies, and once you get labelled as an attention seeker, that is it. It's permanently in your notes for every subsequent healthcare professional to read and bias their opinion of you.

I sincerely wish you all the best, and hope that you have a better experience of seeking help that I have

*Willow*