I am not recommending this, just sharing what i do when i feel like i'm about to SI, or i can't control my suicidal thoughts. I smoke a tiny bit of weed and the urge just completely goes away. I've talked to my psychiatrist about this, and although marijuana is NOT the solution, both her and i would rather that i smoke a bit of pot at the end of the day as opposed to cutting/ fantasizing about suicide. I dunno, i kind of feel like it's the lesser of two evils...