Decogirl,
Welcome!! I am glad that you found this place and I hope that you find it helpful. I do not have children, but I can only imagine how hard it must be to see them grow up before your eyes. Maybe now that your youngest is starting school you could get a part time job or do some volunteering? It could give you something to do while your kids are at school and it would probably help with your sadness of having them away because you were helping others.
I suffer from depression and I know that when I keep busy I feel sooo much better. I was happy to see that you have started knitting. My mom does that and I could never figure it out (laugh).

Stay strong,
Jessica

<font color=blue>The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain</font color=blue>