Quote:
Originally Posted by sentient6
I am 17 years old and I've been suffering form severe depression for 3 years. I also have usual panic attacks. Quite a lot of times, ever since I was little, I get paranoid and believe that everyone I know is against me and want me dead, or that there are paranormal beings around me, trying to hurt me. This period is very hard for me and I have very intense suicidal thoughts which I find very hard to fight. Most of the time I feel like I'm losing touch with reality. For example, I was out last night and walking alone. For no reason at all I was heading to a place where I thought two people where seating, and I realized I was alone just as I started talking to them. Two days ago I got really paranoid (not sure if this is the right word) and I thought my brother had been possessed by a demon and my father was about to kill me with a knife. I felt desperate, alone and afraid. This isn't the first time this has happened. For a few years now I've been seeing and hearing a lot of weird things too. Like, many times, when I walk the road down my house I see dead people inside cars. But right now, it's really awful, I feel like I'm losing touch with reality more and more, especially since my depression got worse (I was actually getting better but it got bad again). I don't feel safe with or without people and I'm afraid I'm not able to fight this time and get through it. I'm tired. Please help me.
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You just need to remember if you realize that its not there then you are one step ahead of the game. I still hallucinate but am at the point where i know its my mind playing tricks on me because of lack of sleep ect. My paranoia is still super bad... So I got a lizard. I know it sounds silly but for me, having another living being that has no judgment no words just sits is helpful. I would honestly reccomend you talking to someone. You dont want to end up doing something that you'd regret or that would harm yourself in anyway. Just remember you are not alone and there is a way out of this. Stay as positive as you can and reach out to those who you know won't respond rashly. Like to this forum. There are also a bunch of hotlines they help with guiding you in the right direction. I would reccomend one of those obviously if safety is involved it is no longer anonymous so remember that. Good luck to you and stay safe.
"I respectfully decline the invitation to join your hallucination"
=)